Narayana (na-RAA-ya-na) Ragain-Knoles was born to Tiffany Ragain and me on August 28th. With three brothers and four sisters, Narayana evens up the girl-boy ratio in my children.
Now in my 37th year of fatherhood, and with the arrival of a new child, here are my reflections on the art of parenting. I think this will be informative to the parents, and non-parents in our community as it speaks to each one of us, born into this world from the field of absolute manifest and striving to live our dharma.
Though a child’s consciousness is new-born to this generation, it is not new to life or to living. Parents do set the initial conditions and attract the consciousness to be born; but the art of parenting goes beyond that.
Every newborn consciousness brings with him ambition kindled by his unfulfilled desires, but vibrant deep within his very existence is his dharma, his personal role in the evolution of his generation.
In the Vedic worldview, unfulfilled desires are one product of one’s karma, while the personal evolutionary role vibrant within one is one’s dharma. A child’s dharma forms the foundations of his character; a child’s karma forges his personality.
When dharma is recognized and lived fully, then the growing child works out his karma naturally and frictionlessly, either by fulfilling his desires through manifesting their objects, or by experiencing the desires’ source within the inner bliss of Being, thereby expanding beyond the desires’ boundaries. The result of dharma-recognition is liberation, a life of heaven on earth.
The art of parenting lies in helping the child to discover first his dharma as the means to prevail over his karma. That is, for the child first to re-cognise his personal role in the evolution of his generation, then to use that role to fulfill his desires. This approach will employ desire-fulfillment as a training ground for exercising one’s dharma. For this to occur spontaneously, regular practise of Vedic Meditation by parent and child is pivotal.
In the absence of dharma-recognition, the child’s only remaining endeavour, attempting solely to fulfill his unfulfilled desires, will possess life and misguide the process of living. This makes life karma-oriented rather than dharma-oriented, dominated by personality instead of identified with radiant character, ruled by ambition without embracing its purpose.
Therefore, as parents we have the responsibility not merely to help our children fulfill their desires, not merely to help them figure out ‘who’ they are. Rather, we must encourage them to re-cognise what they are [all-inclusive consciousness]; to know why they are here in this generation.
We must help children to live their dharma.
Jai Guru Deva,
Thom Knoles
